To generate some laughter you are going to need driving jokes. Here are some drivers jokes for you. What kind of driver never gets a ticket? A screwdriver! I like when flies wont leave my car on long road trips. Have fun moving to Kansas, you tiny idiot. Why did the taxi driver lose his job? Because he kept driving his customers away! A: Non-Athletic Sport Centered Around Rednecks Q: If Robert Pressley, John Andretti and Geoff Bodine were in a boat and the Boat Sinks, Who They just park in circle and say ohm the whole time. Q: Why does a Formula One driver carry crap in his wallet? But if you chase cars, youll get exhausted. Well, as I said to another comment: if they can make fun of our sport, it's only right for us to do the same to theirs. The Rainbow Warrior says, "I'll send you and your whole family for a week at Disneyland." It is easy to tell when NASCAR fans watch Formula One events. What do you call a guy who always loses his car?Carlos. I feel like Im one of the few folks who likes NASCAR and soccer. They nees to take him for a ride along at Daytona with some one in a car with a bit more power in a pack of ten or so. What is the main difference between BMWs and Porcupines?Porcupines carry their pricks on the outside. You can change your preferences. I really need to get my car fixed.What body shop do you wreck-amend? Let us know what you think! Here's my joke. In the spirit of the intersection of these two events, we're offering you a With the rise of self-driving vehicles, it's only a matter of time before we get a country song where a guy's truck leaves him too. Setup File Name: Adobe_Premiere_Pro_v23.2.0.69.rar. Because fans get to shout, Look at that S-car go!. NASCAR isnt always just about the race. . I just don't let it bother me and play into the joke. Because bad news travels fast. I-Renato gas for my vehicle! Never get into a lane-merging game of chicken with a person who has a garbage bag for a car-door window. 3. I stopped to pick up a hitchhiker. What kind of vehicle does a chicken drive?A coop. 28. Have the scanner open so all the cars can talk just for safety, and then have him at the wheel with his copilot and open scanner. A good vehicle will get wrecked, and a bad vehicle will finish the race. Wait a second, you're not handicapped, You don't need a Wheelchair." ", As soon as the vehicle rolled into the pitstop, the jack said? If India ever hosted Nascar would it be called Namascar? A: Non-Athletic Sport Centered Around Rednecks Don't worry; the funny jokes about cars won't be targeting you or your driving skills *wink wink*. The first was the idea that Carl Edwards was returning in a fourth Team Penske car. They keep changing tracks. Matt Kenseth's car breaks down on the Interstate, so "9:12" eases over onto the shoulder. Hilarious Nascar Jokes That Will Make You Laugh - YellowJokes How do Prius owners drive?One hand on the wheel, the other patting themselves on the back. Honda is the oldest car made in the world. Whats the official jersey of Nascar? I guess you could say things Escaladed quickly. How do you watch NASCAR without a TV?You flush a bag of M&M's down the toilet. Kids may not know how to drive, but that doesnt stop them from loving cars any less. What does the car brand FIAT stand for?Fix-It Again Tomorrow. None - they took the wheels off their homes years ago. What do you get when dinosaurs crash their cars? 42. ._3bX7W3J0lU78fp7cayvNxx{max-width:208px;text-align:center} Shaking the Busch, Boss 6. I'm not a fan of NASCAR It has a top speed of 34, the electrics don't work, and the radio works but only plays the theme from "Hawaii Five-O" and you cant turn it off. 85-2987. They drove up to the farm, Kyle got out and knocked on the front door and was let in. So, if you are into the roaring, rumbling, scraping, or screeching, someone who can't pipe down when it comes to autos, or just someone who doesn't mind a funny joke about cars, you are in for a greasy treat. Jeff asked, "Aren't you going to have any?" Click on the link above to discover more about the top 10 female drivers taking over a male-dominated sport. The Gran Purr-ismo. 30. In one class, he asks the students if anyone can give him an example of a "tragedy". 6. Oh, and that is at zero RPM. Someone complimented me on my driving the other day.They left a note on the windscreen - Parking Fine! Lamborghini once decided to ditch the ICE entirely and focus on electric cars for foreseeable future. What do all French cars come with as standard?A spare wheel of cheese. "Viper, YOU HAVE SINNED. What has an IQ of 100 and a full set of teeth? A couple of laps later, the bartender says "Earnhardt Jr is up to 10th". Why do rednecks like to do it doggie style? Why are racecar drivers the best people to go to for dating advice?Theyre trained to look for red flags. F*ck NASCAR! 10. 54. Kyle goes out for 3 straight days with no luck. This understandably shook up the other two, and so they both jumped when the second door openedand they saw an even MORE disgusting example of automaking gone wrong. Why are fans from Finland critical to motor racing? 40. The adrenaline rush, extreme exhilaration and competitive driving at high speeds make racing games quite popular. Authorities believe it to be race-related. A: A true restrictor plate Did you hear about the Yoga class for electric cars? Whats the difference between NASCAR and the NBA? A Ford Focus Electric and a Kia Soul went on a date. What is Catwomans favourite racing game? Q: How can you tell when a nascar fan is watching a Formula One race? Why do chicken coops have 2 doors?If they had four they'd be chicken sedans. Have you heard about the Nascar driver thats in the KKK? What is the car dealership in Star Wars called? Why did the owner name his vehicle 'Bad News'? If a cars chasing you, youll definitely get tired. What is a Tesla Model 3s favorite dance?The Electric Slide. The salesman comes around and says: "Can't understand how it could possibly be the case, the new sedan is so much quieter". What goes around comes around. Q: What's the hardest thing about trying to become the first woman to win the Daytona 500? (I heard this forever ago and wanted to share. Have you tried them yet? Eventually, the F1 snowman driver had to give up motor racing. The second boy says, "I'd like a 4 wheeler so I can Go out mudbogging out behind my house" Gordon says, "I'll get you the best Four Wheeler With all the safety Features and I'll have someone teach you how to drive it safely." Saimonas Lukoius and. As soon as I get up in the morning I think of women, when I eat, shower, watch TV, everything seems to make me think of women." And Matt Kenseth said, "and look at this. That way they can **BOTH** watch NASCAR. Christ said "I do not speak of my own Accord". What kind of car do frogs like best?A Beetle! Not so sure about that a lot of them have a checkered past. Ashleigh Plumptre, Asisat Oshoala among 6 most beautiful Super Falcons players, NBA star Kyrie Irving opens up on having family in Ghana, explains $45k support to Africa, Klopp makes exciting claim about rivals Manchester United ahead of derby, The major traditions of golf's major tournament ahead of 2023 event, Chelsea spirits high despite horror run, says Potter, Finally! That sports science segment has changed enough people's minds. Come and join me. Out jump two of his pit crew members in trench coats, who walk to the rear of the vehicle where they stand facing oncoming traffic and begin opening their coats and exposing themselves to approaching drivers while another two get out of the back seat and begin checking the car. What do you call a German electric car?A Voltswagen. Then, before the cops can ask where he is, he says, "Hey, never mind, I'm in the back seat." ._3-SW6hQX6gXK9G4FM74obr{display:inline-block;vertical-align:text-bottom;width:16px;height:16px;font-size:16px;line-height:16px} 8. Stewart Your Engines 4. NASCAR had their 2010 overview today which means its just about that time of year. Q: What would Dale Earnhardt be doing if he was alive today? Knock, knock! I guess that makes me racist. "What a joke he is." My 35-year boycott of Ferrari and Lamborghini is still going strong!And will continue until they lower the price. What do the motorsport drivers say during arguments? Between the Disney movies about talking vehicles and how much time they spend in their car seat, its no wonder your tike is obsessed. Apparently he hasn't passed anything for almost 2 years! They both came in a little behind. None they took the wheels off their homes years ago. The voice of the Devil was heard: "Rusty, YOU HAVE SINNED!!! Redneck: Thats nascar ye got there., 2. Why couldnt the frog find where he parked his car? Two Cadillac drivers got in a fender-bender, got out of their cars, and then started yelling at each other.Within a few seconds, they were in a fistfight. Jokes4us.com Privacy Policy. What has 10 letters and starts with G-A-S? Apparently NASCAR fans didnt want to mix the races. What do you need to be able to drive in the outback? Liberals who watch Rupal Drag Race cannot make fun of conservatives for liking Nascar. Then it clicked. What does NASCAR stand for? Matthew McConaughey just bought NASCAR And hes making racers drive the opposite direction. So I called him a racist. You are condemned to spend the rest of eternity in the drivers seat of this car!" Q: What Does Dale Earnhardt And Pink Floyd Have In Common? 60. What type of snakes are found on cars?Windshield Vipers! 64. 5.Going in circles. Iona, who? .LalRrQILNjt65y-p-QlWH{fill:var(--newRedditTheme-actionIcon);height:18px;width:18px}.LalRrQILNjt65y-p-QlWH rect{stroke:var(--newRedditTheme-metaText)}._3J2-xIxxxP9ISzeLWCOUVc{height:18px}.FyLpt0kIWG1bTDWZ8HIL1{margin-top:4px}._2ntJEAiwKXBGvxrJiqxx_2,._1SqBC7PQ5dMOdF0MhPIkA8{vertical-align:middle}._1SqBC7PQ5dMOdF0MhPIkA8{-ms-flex-align:center;align-items:center;display:-ms-inline-flexbox;display:inline-flex;-ms-flex-direction:row;flex-direction:row;-ms-flex-pack:center;justify-content:center} Also, she's a firm believer that pineapple belongs on a pizza. A: Caution Flag Yellow When parents want their babies to become future motorsport drivers, they feed them Formula One. Your image is too large, maximum file size is 8 MB. 25. Apparently NASCAR is banning all Confederate flags from its races. What do you call a speedster made of French bread? Did you hear about the driver who lost his left arm and leg in a terrible racing accident? "These are my emergency flashers!" And Rusty, like Martin before him, was whisked off. The cop, clearly enraged, runs toward Matt's disabled vehicle yelling, 24. This time, he is bruised and bleeding. If she's not writing or editing pics for the Gram, she's probably hitting legs at the gym. They take the next left. "What the hell is going on here?" Top Nav. Although racing requires ultimate seriousness and focus from all motorsport team members, including drivers, humour adds more flavour to the game. "Well, what are these perverts doing here by the road?" Was the cord too long?" 23. My sweetheart is always taking health food crazes too far.Now, its even affecting my driving. Q: What do Matt Kenseth fans use for Birth Control? Bot necessarily making them fans but they dont shit on it as readily. They don't understand the level of engineering, development, and stategy that go into these races. So the turns are all right all right all right. The boy has a history of being beaten by his parents and the judge initially awarded custody to his aunt, in keeping with child custody law and regulation requiring that family unity be maintained to the highest degree possible. Haha. The dog jumps up, and runs around the barstool 25 times. Q: Why isn't NASCAR driver Jeremy Mayfield worried about reportedly testing positive for methamphetamines again? Just to show him the draft and pack dynamics. Q: What do Matt Kenseth fans use for Birth Control? Authorities believe it to be race-related. After she ordered her drink she turned to "Superman" and asked him, "Are you a real race car driver?" Have you Heard? Small Town 1. Jeff Burton went to work for the telephone company so he could finally get on the pole. "Wonderful!" I think its important to keep the races separate. One advertises there sponspors and the other keeps it hidden! Why should Microsoft, Intel and Nvidia get into the motorsport business? Lmao. 2019 included two separate NASCAR April Fools Day jokes. 62. They were a little confused at their present situation, and they were startled to see a door in the wall open, behind the door was perhaps the ugliest 1973 Pinto they had ever seen. Q: What Does NASCAR Stand For? It was quite a traffic jam. asks The Rainbow Warrior, "Isn't there any one here who can give me an example of a tragedy?" Id be a terrible NASCAR driver because Im always right. What kind of cars do people in Norway drive? The boy surprised the court when he proclaimed that his aunt beat him more than his parents and he adamantly refused to live with her. Whats the difference between a Ferrari and six trash bags full of recyclable cans? Whats the difference between politicians and nascar drivers? Whats the difference between a Fiat and a golf ball? Motorsport racing has garnered a reputation as one of the most fan-friendly sports in the world. What do you call a guy who always loses his car? Potato Why do Swiss drivers have the least number of Formula 1 victories? What is the least favourite meal for drivers? Al Unser Jr calls the police, and says, "They stole my dashboard, they stole my steering wheel, they stole my brake pedal, Hell, they even stole my gas pedal" I prefer Indy car over NascarI guess that makes me racist. The priest replied, "No.I think I'll just wait for the police." Legendary talk show host Jay Leno is an avid car collector and that is a fact few can dispute. A funny thing happened between NASCAR's Riverside-related panic and its proposed start date for the Left-Right series: not only did the California road course get a A: Because They Can Not Drive On The Road! What is the car dealership in Star Wars called?The Mazda-lorian. Bobby jumps and bounces at the end of the cord, but when he comes back up, the Jeff notices that he has a few cuts and scratches. You are condemned to spend the rest of eternity in the drivers seat of this car!" With that in mind, check out the top 64 NASCAR jokes. What is a lacrosse players favorite type of car? You should get a job at a transmission repair shop. Q: If Robert Pressley, John Andretti and Geoff Bodine were in a boat and the Boat Sinks, Who Would be saved? Jimmie Johnson goes into a bar still dressed in his race suit and ordered a drink. Hey Pandas, Post A Picture Of A Cat Being Naughty, 30 Pictures Of Beautiful Bangladeshi People By Mou Aysha (New Pics), 79 Surreal Images Of Sneakers Placed In Some Very Interesting Locations By Carlos Jimnez Varela. "If a school bus carrying fifty children drove off a cliff, killing everyone involved that would be a tragedy." ._1EPynDYoibfs7nDggdH7Gq{margin-bottom:8px;position:relative}._1EPynDYoibfs7nDggdH7Gq._3-0c12FCnHoLz34dQVveax{max-height:63px;overflow:hidden}._1zPvgKHteTOub9dKkvrOl4{font-family:Noto Sans,Arial,sans-serif;font-size:14px;line-height:21px;font-weight:400;word-wrap:break-word}._1dp4_svQVkkuV143AIEKsf{-ms-flex-align:baseline;align-items:baseline;background-color:var(--newCommunityTheme-body);bottom:-2px;display:-ms-flexbox;display:flex;-ms-flex-flow:row nowrap;flex-flow:row nowrap;padding-left:2px;position:absolute;right:-8px}._5VBcBVybCfosCzMJlXzC3{font-family:Noto Sans,Arial,sans-serif;font-size:14px;font-weight:400;line-height:21px;color:var(--newCommunityTheme-bodyText)}._3YNtuKT-Is6XUBvdluRTyI{position:relative;background-color:0;color:var(--newCommunityTheme-metaText);fill:var(--newCommunityTheme-metaText);border:0;padding:0 8px}._3YNtuKT-Is6XUBvdluRTyI:before{content:"";position:absolute;top:0;left:0;width:100%;height:100%;border-radius:9999px;background:var(--newCommunityTheme-metaText);opacity:0}._3YNtuKT-Is6XUBvdluRTyI:hover:before{opacity:.08}._3YNtuKT-Is6XUBvdluRTyI:focus{outline:none}._3YNtuKT-Is6XUBvdluRTyI:focus:before{opacity:.16}._3YNtuKT-Is6XUBvdluRTyI._2Z_0gYdq8Wr3FulRLZXC3e:before,._3YNtuKT-Is6XUBvdluRTyI:active:before{opacity:.24}._3YNtuKT-Is6XUBvdluRTyI:disabled,._3YNtuKT-Is6XUBvdluRTyI[data-disabled],._3YNtuKT-Is6XUBvdluRTyI[disabled]{cursor:not-allowed;filter:grayscale(1);background:none;color:var(--newCommunityTheme-metaTextAlpha50);fill:var(--newCommunityTheme-metaTextAlpha50)}._2ZTVnRPqdyKo1dA7Q7i4EL{transition:all .1s linear 0s}.k51Bu_pyEfHQF6AAhaKfS{transition:none}._2qi_L6gKnhyJ0ZxPmwbDFK{transition:all .1s linear 0s;display:block;background-color:var(--newCommunityTheme-field);border-radius:4px;padding:8px;margin-bottom:12px;margin-top:8px;border:1px solid var(--newCommunityTheme-canvas);cursor:pointer}._2qi_L6gKnhyJ0ZxPmwbDFK:focus{outline:none}._2qi_L6gKnhyJ0ZxPmwbDFK:hover{border:1px solid var(--newCommunityTheme-button)}._2qi_L6gKnhyJ0ZxPmwbDFK._3GG6tRGPPJiejLqt2AZfh4{transition:none;border:1px solid var(--newCommunityTheme-button)}.IzSmZckfdQu5YP9qCsdWO{cursor:pointer;transition:all .1s linear 0s}.IzSmZckfdQu5YP9qCsdWO ._1EPynDYoibfs7nDggdH7Gq{border:1px solid transparent;border-radius:4px;transition:all .1s linear 0s}.IzSmZckfdQu5YP9qCsdWO:hover ._1EPynDYoibfs7nDggdH7Gq{border:1px solid var(--newCommunityTheme-button);padding:4px}._1YvJWALkJ8iKZxUU53TeNO{font-size:12px;font-weight:700;line-height:16px;color:var(--newCommunityTheme-button)}._3adDzm8E3q64yWtEcs5XU7{display:-ms-flexbox;display:flex}._3adDzm8E3q64yWtEcs5XU7 ._3jyKpErOrdUDMh0RFq5V6f{-ms-flex:100%;flex:100%}._3adDzm8E3q64yWtEcs5XU7 .dqhlvajEe-qyxij0jNsi0{color:var(--newCommunityTheme-button)}._3adDzm8E3q64yWtEcs5XU7 ._12nHw-MGuz_r1dQx5YPM2v,._3adDzm8E3q64yWtEcs5XU7 .dqhlvajEe-qyxij0jNsi0{font-size:12px;font-weight:700;line-height:16px;cursor:pointer;-ms-flex-item-align:end;align-self:flex-end;-webkit-user-select:none;-ms-user-select:none;user-select:none}._3adDzm8E3q64yWtEcs5XU7 ._12nHw-MGuz_r1dQx5YPM2v{color:var(--newCommunityTheme-button);margin-right:8px;color:var(--newCommunityTheme-errorText)}._3zTJ9t4vNwm1NrIaZ35NS6{font-family:Noto Sans,Arial,sans-serif;font-size:14px;line-height:21px;font-weight:400;word-wrap:break-word;width:100%;padding:0;border:none;background-color:transparent;resize:none;outline:none;cursor:pointer;color:var(--newRedditTheme-bodyText)}._2JIiUcAdp9rIhjEbIjcuQ-{resize:none;cursor:auto}._2I2LpaEhGCzQ9inJMwliNO,._42Nh7O6pFcqnA6OZd3bOK{display:inline-block;margin-left:4px;vertical-align:middle}._42Nh7O6pFcqnA6OZd3bOK{fill:var(--newCommunityTheme-button);color:var(--newCommunityTheme-button);height:16px;width:16px;margin-bottom:2px} In the spirit of their fascination with all things auto, buckle up for these fun and hilarious kid-friendly car jokes, witty puns, and one-liners that will really move the little or big kid in your life. Thank you for taking the time to share your feedback with us! WebA cop was waiting in a speed trap on the interstate when a guy in a sport car came racing by him at over a 100 mph. It doesn't appear in any feeds, and anyone with a direct link to it will see a message like this one. Both cars are totally demolished, but amazingly, neither are hurt. Is it possible to watch NASCAR without a TV? A: Their personalities. 31. Absolutely, just flush a bag of M&M's down the toilet. Those people are normally sad people that make fun of others for liking something different and just try to fit in with what the cool influencers do. Q: What is the difference between Tony Stewarts car and a porcupine? Motorsport drivers do not eat before a race, so they do not get Indy-gestion. Have a look at the top 10 funniest race car jokes for fans. Jimmie Johnson's ( @JimmieJohnson) tweet from 1:25pm EDT on Tuesday, September 27th, 2022: @Alex_Bowman @WorldofOutlaws @allyracing I understand that, without my agreement, @Alex_Bowman has put out a Tweet this afternoon that I am driving for him next year. Within a few seconds, they were in a fistfight. After they have everything ready, they decide to give the crowd a demonstration. A girl raises her hand. By doing so it creates people with an unfair advantage when it comes to competition. Two Cadillac drivers got in a fender-bender, got out of their cars, and then started yelling at each other. Illegal drag racing or street racing can become as dangerous or even more dangerous than a Nascar pileup. Neeeeoooww! What's worse than raining cats and dogs?Hailing taxis! After two recesses to check legal references and confer with the Child Welfare officials, the judge granted temporary custody to Danica Patrick, whom the boy firmly believes is not capable of beating anyone." What do you call a VW bus at the top of a hill? Why didn't the two Alfa Romeo owners say hi to each other when they met at the bar? A: He Loves Getting Slammed In The Rear. ._1aTW4bdYQHgSZJe7BF2-XV{display:-ms-grid;display:grid;-ms-grid-columns:auto auto 42px;grid-template-columns:auto auto 42px;column-gap:12px}._3b9utyKN3e_kzVZ5ngPqAu,._21RLQh5PvUhC6vOKoFeHUP{font-size:16px;font-weight:500;line-height:20px}._21RLQh5PvUhC6vOKoFeHUP:before{content:"";margin-right:4px;color:#46d160}._22W-auD0n8kTKDVe0vWuyK,._244EzVTQLL3kMNnB03VmxK{display:inline-block;word-break:break-word}._22W-auD0n8kTKDVe0vWuyK{font-weight:500}._22W-auD0n8kTKDVe0vWuyK,._244EzVTQLL3kMNnB03VmxK{font-size:12px;line-height:16px}._244EzVTQLL3kMNnB03VmxK{font-weight:400;color:var(--newCommunityTheme-metaText)}._2xkErp6B3LSS13jtzdNJzO{-ms-flex-align:center;align-items:center;display:-ms-flexbox;display:flex;margin-top:13px;margin-bottom:2px}._2xkErp6B3LSS13jtzdNJzO ._22W-auD0n8kTKDVe0vWuyK{font-size:12px;font-weight:400;line-height:16px;margin-right:4px;margin-left:4px;color:var(--newCommunityTheme-actionIcon)}._2xkErp6B3LSS13jtzdNJzO .je4sRPuSI6UPjZt_xGz8y{border-radius:4px;box-sizing:border-box;height:21px;width:21px}._2xkErp6B3LSS13jtzdNJzO .je4sRPuSI6UPjZt_xGz8y:nth-child(2),._2xkErp6B3LSS13jtzdNJzO .je4sRPuSI6UPjZt_xGz8y:nth-child(3){margin-left:-9px} Nascar pit crews have one very solid benefit A good retirement plan. Honda is the oldest car made in the world. ''Lauda.'' Who is there? Q: What did the ace car say to the letter R? He drove a Honda, but he didn't say much about it. Its not a bad thing to joke about different sports, but I think that the left turn is just getting old at this point. Working at a Land Rover factory is so interesting. The front row at a NASCAR race. How would you rate the quality of the article? A: For identification. "My God," exclaims Jeff, "When did you start wearing women's underwear?" The concrete barrier is the hardest at the tracks you wreck at. 10. Who is there? This article is not just a compilation of some of the funniest race car jokes for car guys but also a source of laughter for any sports lover hungry for a chuckle. "I'm afraid not," explains The WonderBoy. Why do conservatives hate the NASCAR subreddit? What kind of car does Jesus drive?A Christler. Have I given you the tour of my estate yet?It is a Vauxhall. What do you get when dinosaurs crash their cars?Tyrannosaurus wrecks. 6. Did you hear NASCAR and Formula One were trying to make an Ultimate Showdown race but it got cancelled due to controversy? You name it, and You Got It!" Cars rip by at 200mph, so how fast do you have to be a NASCAR cameraman? That's My Bowyer Clint Bowyer at Daytona. Press J to jump to the feed.